I am writing this (of course) partly for myself. Every now and then I can be the Queen of a pathetic funk. The rest of the time I am a Super Hero of Consciousness lol and whilst there is an in between, I find the change in my frequency at these more challenging times, extraordinarily uncomfortable.
I have some old patterns of fear when this starts to happen of clinging onto support and thinking that I can’t manage, when actually I’m more than well equipped, no matter what is unfolding around me.
To be fair major funks are rare for me today. Most challenges provide me with fuel. However, whilst I’ve knocked it out of the park with physical accomplishments during lock down, there’s been a couple of moments when I haven’t been as epic in the emotional department.
Typically, when I’m over myself and manage to mess my way through my thinking to a certain point, then I make a decision and change it. Then I wonder what the hell I was thinking.
I’m not saying I’m not compassionate with myself, I practice exceptional self care no matter what, and I allow for what’s happening, look into it with kindness and curiosity and don’t judge.
Occasionally, I need a major self generated kick up the backside. Here’s some of what I’m aware of at these times:
1.Remember to act according to who you are and want to be, not according to the current conditions of your life
The conditions in your life, will never be as you want them to be and could always be better or worse. They will change when YOU change, not before.
So, the longer you stay funky, the longer it will take for them to change. I’m not saying don’t have a funk, prolong your funk or even enjoy it, but know that it’s on you to change the conditions you are reacting to.
2. Patterns blow up in our face when we are ready to release them
We get fed up, frazzled, f**ked off when we are finally ready to release something. If you are about to lose it and that last little straw is about to snap, then as long as you are half way conscious, that is a recipe for opportunity, change and truth to enter.
If things are really tough and hard to tolerate right now, it’s because you are ready for a greater version of you to show up and take over. You are not okay functioning from that old paradigm any longer.
Life works from the old breaking down before the new can show up and until we master this game, it can seem unbearable, scary, unmanageable and like we’re not coping. Our distress is a sign of how badly that change is required and can feel excruciating.
Once we have weathered this type of “spiritual upgrade” a few times, we learn to recognize it sooner and panic a bit less.
3. Let go, know life is happening for you and practice trust
Sometimes when our last little vestige of pride, self control and cool is in the gutter, we are about to get a huge win. Life has a way of cracking the toughest ego so that a kinder, gentler, more compassionate version of us can show up.
When that’s what’s happening, let go, (all your attempts at control have failed anyway). Stop resisting and trust that there is a bigger plan playing out. Although we have free will, sometimes we get the opportunity to show up greater than we planned and that doesn’t happen when we are comfortable. The shit storm isn’t just an unfortunate event, it can be clearing your path so a more refined and wiser version of you can emerge.
We will get back on the path when it’s time and it will either be in a different direction or with heaps of skills and knowledge that we didn’t have before (which actually ultimately helps save time). Either way it’s a win and either way your soul chose that lesson to help you realize who you came here to be.
4. Don’t stay stuck whatever you do
Stuck is the most helpless, painful place to be in my opinion. Take action towards what you think you might want (even without much clarity, all experiences contribute). On the way, all sorts of insights will drop in and situations will manifest for your growth and guidance. This is the way in which we co create with life.
5. Kick Judgment to the curb
If judgment is looming large for you right now, remember people judge what you do that they aren’t willing to have. (It makes them feel really bad about themselves). Others will also attack to cover up what they did they feel bad about or what they are doing, as a defense mechanism.
It can be very difficult to accept that other people we like or who we want to like us are functioning from these limitations. I find seeing other’s limitations and not taking them personally is a form of mental discipline and a choice that is one of the most challenging for me.
Sometimes it comes down to “I want to value my life, more than I want to be upset right now”.
The rules change a bit with this when we’ve had trauma and people with trauma typically find this extremely difficult. Then the battle is learning to not feel wrong as a result of a discrepancy between your world and someone else’s and feel what another thinks is more valid than our own thoughts.
Remember if you are reading this, you are already onto it and looking to manage your life and feelings better. Well done!
