1.Remove traumas pathways from your body and brain
Trauma has a profound effect on many people, without them even knowing and overlays everything they think, feel and do. We live in a culture where trauma and abuse is normal. Even if your family is healthy and functional ‘kid logic’ ensures, we will have some internalized trauma.
Small things can land in a painful way for little people. Pre occupied or stressed adults can end up sending a message of abandonment or rejection without any intent, that gets interperted as a wrongness of the receiver, creating toxic shame.
The thing about trauma is we don’t know often when we have it. We may just think we don’t deal with life well, or we are anxious or depressed because our partner left or we missed a job opportunity we wanted, or we struggled in lockdown.
None of those things would be overly bothersome if we are resilient and don’t have pre existing ‘stuff’. Of course we would grieve, let go, process or feel disappointment, that is normal, but we probably wouldn’t be troubled by them to the extent we would have self doubt, or suffer as a result of a change in circumstance or lost opportunity.
For me having worked through my own trauma, the difference is night and day and I sense there is still more to go. Science is now proving for example ADD is merely childhood trauma. I had massive confusion in my life in the past and it’s only now I’m free that my clarity has become immense. Trauma is so tricky and confounding and the symptoms aren’t always what we’d expect.
We are taught to manage stress by avoiding triggers. But triggers are a sign we have a loaded gun inside us which has nothing to do with the person triggering us. Reactivity is another sign we are carrying trauma.
If you want to change your life, deal with your trauma. Face it, understand it, release it and your life will powerfully change. Many mental health issues resolve once we are trauma free. Most anxiety and depression is the result of trauma.
The best tools I have found for trauma release are: The Access Bars, EMDR, Kundalini breathwork and having a daily pranayama breathwork practice. Secondary bodywork practices I would also recommend are the Access Consciousness BMMS body process if you are from an upset family and the Abuse Hold Process.
I have taught the Access Bars for 5 years and have worked with it for 7 years in my practice. I see BMMs create powerful change over and over for people who I work with and some are powerfully drawn to the Abuse Hold Process which I also offer. I share pranayama resources with my clients too.
The thing about breathwork is it strengthens your stressed and your relaxed nervous systems so you can face stressors and triggers better now, it creates resilience and the ability to switch between nervous systems to deal with any situation.
2. Adopt a present-future focus
As soon as you are free enough of old baggage and the processing of it, you naturally start to use every moment to simultaneously co-create your present and future. I think for me when I was trauma based I found it impossible to live in the present and very difficult to imagine my future.
However, it’s also possible to start to shift your focus forwards and still deal with past patterns or issues arising as you need to. An overall present-future focus doesn’t stop us from taking time to do that.
This paradigm allows you to be extremely grateful for your past choices and the learning contained therein. Once the energy of these is released, you can respond moment to moment from your inner potency, to generate your highest future and self.
From this state, we can take actions today that allow us to create the future that will benefit us 2 years and 5 years from today, whilst simultaneously enjoying what we are doing and getting paid now.
3. Seek knowledge/information that empowers you psychologically and spiritually
Life happens for us and not to us. We are responsible for every thought, feeling emotion, attraction, manifestation and set of events we ‘encounter’. Once we are empowered, we naturally take charge of ourselves and enjoy life.
Really we are co-creating with the Universe for our own benefit (whether that is learning or loving what shows up) and whether we do that with awareness and deliberately or accidentally or unconsciously.
If you don’t like what is manifesting, life is gifting you the opportunity to be different, so that your life becomes different. By owning it and changing from the inside out, everything around you will shift to acknowledge this and meet you where you are at in a gentle and loving way.
4. See the benefits in and be grateful for every experience
Appreciating and seeing the opportunity for growth in everything, even heartbreaks, grief and disappointments, is key to your own empowerment and to a life well lived.
This is a knack and takes some time to absorb and become good at (like any muscle we have newly discovered). Once you adopt the ability to see the benefit in every situation and have a mindset of continual self improvement, there is nothing you cannot overcome or accomplish.
You stop becoming reactive to things outside of yourself over which you have no control and you realize by developing mastery from the inside out, you excel in the world.
5. Talk in the language of your body
Your body is your best friend and greatest instrument through which you experience all of life. It is constantly relaying information to you about the external world and your internal state as well.
Learn to speak it’s language for ease with absolutely everything. When we are on the same page with our body we interpret all symptoms and sensations as information and we become wise.
We allow our body to guide us, understanding through it’s sensations, who and what is for us and what is showing up far in advance of what our logical mind can comprehend.
6. Function from knowing (as well as from thoughts and feelings)
Acknowledge your feelings and allow them to flow (always allow them to be present and to release), but don’t worship at the alter of them, Feelings are temporary sensations that guide us as to whether our beliefs (and thoughts) are healthy or not. That is all.
The magic lies in the fact that we are wired in a way that our feelings will guide us to a higher consciousness, if we stop reacting to external stimuli we don’t like (getting upset) and start align our thoughts to create a positive experience of our life instead.
Your feelings are your body’s reaction to your thoughts and therefore are as high quality as the quality of your thinking.
Learn to intervene in your own thinking, to change your feelings and grow as a person, taking on a higher frequency and becoming a match for the people, places and things you desire. Knowing is being, perceiving and receiving. It is pure and instantaneous. Knowing is light and expansive, feelings are often heavy and limiting.
Now, I want to be very clear, I am NOT talking about a by-pass created through fake positivity. Far from it, I am speaking about using your feelings as a guide to see where you have unhealthy and unhelpful beliefs, as you do the work to explore and dismantle those beliefs, the quality of your feelings and life experience will improve.
This is quite different from a by-pass and takes a lot of inner work and self awareness.
7. Discover how to channel energy, receive inspiration and flow it outwards to others
Energy is one of the things we’re not taught about in an emotional or relational context.
This is what presence is all about. If you can master the previous six points you will automatically be expanded energetically with your barriers down.
You will be able to receive massive amounts from life your higher self and the collective unconscious. Inspiration, love, kindness and money can flow your way. Others truly sense this and will seek you out and connect with you, creating amazing relationships and opportunities.