1. FEAR: “I might be the only person that this won’t work for and I’ll have spent all this time/money for nothing”.
In a sense this is a valid argument lol. I used to make this point myself before I embarked boots and all on my current change journey.
Truthfully, I was super good at rationalizing my way out of anything and I thought I was being a real smart ass. Where this argument became self defeating and not so clever, was that I didn’t have any ideas for how to be better and I was afraid.
Your mammalian brain wants to keep you safe from all threats and it rightly, (yet unhelpfully in this instance) registers change as a threat.
The reason it does this, is because the outcome of change is uncertain and we didn’t survive as a species when we didn’t know if that rustle in the long grass was a tiger about to eat us, or the wind.
Be grateful you have good survival instincts. And know that if you need change, you need change. None of us is given a consciousness manual upon arrival on this planet and some of us don’t receive very good life training. There’s nothing wrong with that and it takes courage to admit it.
I’ve never met someone who consistently showed up and did their best every day for whom personal development didn’t work.
The quality of your life isn’t defined by your background, it’s defined by how courageous you are – Juliana Garcia
2. You are addicted to the trauma and the drama
When we have been brought up in the midst of chaos, it seems normal to us. We get addicted to it. In fact if it ever goes away, we re-create it, because we are so uncomfortable, we would rather create it and be in charge than have it happen out of our control and deal with the consequences.
If this is us, we don’t know how to be with ourselves and this is because we have suffered so much, it is too scary.
If you see yourself in this category, you require body work to remove your trauma out of your body, before coaching can work effectively for you. I highly recommend Access Bars. Read more about working with me in this way.
If you want it badly enough, a good life is available to you too. Change is not comfortable, for anyone. And generally the more stuck/rigid we are, the stronger the nudge from life has to be for us to pay attention.
You may have more challenges than most. And, if that’s the case and you are choosing to overcome them, you will do a shit tone of learning and become brave and wise in the process (as long as you stay the course).
Do it!!! It’s better than living the rest of your life in unstable misery with assholes who dump on you on a daily basis, with unhealed abuse, maybe broke or sick and always wondering if you’d taken that opportunity whether things would be different.
3. Life coaching is a load of BS right? It’s just another industry full of charletons waiting to take the money of vulnerable people and run
As with any industry, I’m sure they are around. So, doing your homework is a really great idea!
I’ve spent more than $50k on my training.
It is training that has saved my life and empowered me so much so, that my existence is pretty fabulous these days. I am privileged and blessed to be in a position to pass what I know on to others.
Rather than regurgitating learned information, my knowledge is formulated from integrating and incubating what I learned into wisdom, through painful trial and error. I’d then learn more and put it into practice until it was integrated over the last lot and have been doing this every single day. Now its more through life and less through training, as that equipped me to do the work of getting to here.
I’ve engaged with enough people that I’ve developed my own way of working and body of content that is uniquely mine. I have a genius for seeing where people are limiting themselves (and they can’t see this because they are in it).
I have a another genius for escorting people through changing this stuff and out the other side.
(The best people in the business have done it for themselves).
Very often, judgmental cynicism towards others is usually a mask for deep seated and unacknowledged fear.
4. You think you can do it on your own and save a buck
Here is the train of thought I used to have that you may relate to…”It’s pretty outrageous I’ve endured the life/family/abuse/situation that I’ve had and the thought of paying someone to help make it better on top is so unfair, it just sucks”!
Do you apply that to the Dr, when you create an infection? Or are you grateful for the antibiotics and blood tests?
It’s funny how we’re quick to judge what we will and won’t pay for, based on what we see as a natural advantage/disadvantage and how we justify these things to ourselves!
If you could fix your life by yourself, you already would have!!
Whilst being here and reading this article is a good decision! I can guarantee you aren’t otherwise a consistently good steward of your life, or you would have no need for it! However, feel free to keep grinding your way through it all, in order to save a buck! And continue listening to your ego and making it about the money in order to stay safe (and keep living out the same familiar crap every day).
The whole idea of coaching is to be escorted through change by an expert, that is someone who has done if for themselves and who is highly skilled, knowledgable and experienced. You learn from them until you can thrive independently and become your own source of awareness and guidance.
A talented coach knows the patterns and the pitfalls of the psychology of change and they see where you are tripping yourself up. They know what you need to do/overcome/release, to create the space for the new possibilities you desire. They will show you the skills you need to succeed with. As they walk alongside you, they will hold space, support and escort you through fears and limitations.
Coaching is no different than any other industry. The reason you hire an expert is because you get the job done way better, with less harm, wastage, messing around and wild goose chases, because you don’t know what you are doing. That’s why we hire a mechanic, builder, plumber, hair stylist, accountant, or anyone. In the long run it pays off.
In personal development it is twice as important as any other industry. Here’s why:
It’s your life, your psyche, your soul and spirit, your body, career, income, your relationships and your skill level for navigating your way through life. These are the vital areas of life that coaching can assist you to master.
Can you afford not to hire a coach? For what reason would you struggle your way along, wasting time and resources, when success creates success? If you knew how to nail all these things today, the trajectory that you are on would elevate immediately, eventually multiplying upon itself the benefits you derive.
Therefore you are robbing yourself of a brighter future today and every day from here on out by not having expert help to knock it out of the park and learn the skills you need to do it for yourself.
Go on, what are you waiting for? Contact me today