What’s really required to take charge of your life is no longer just setting goals and mindlessly doing the steps to accomplish them.

Whilst evolution is always valuable, traditional goal setting as a means to an end is now redundant, without the valuable addition of consciousness. As Bradley Cooper sings in the Movie “A Star is Born”, “It’s time to let the old ways Die”

Most of us have figured out by now that having more and doing more is redundant with out BECOMING more. Consciousness is the new black and for good reason.

My definition of consciousness is to be aware of everything and everyone around you without judgement. We develop these abilities through emotional self mastery, spiritual awareness and understanding energetic and body dynamics.

Learning the tools to create a conscious life and implementing them, means we upgrade ourselves and where we operate from. This allows us to achieve more, develop and evolve in all ways. We attain self reliance and eventually wisdom. From there, almost anything is possible.

The process of becoming conscious, is an ongoing quest that requires us to be humble, honest and open, inquisitive and to seek change on the deepest level. As more and more people step up and into this change, the balance of consciousness or the collective is also evolving.

Change, embracing our true nature and being responsible for improving it can be extremely scary and uncomfortable. This is reflected in the current tumultuousness that is taking place in many corners of the globe.

Existing systems are breaking down, new cutting edge technologies are emerging and science is now embarking on new frontiers with the study of human potential, as we eek out better ways of doing and of being.

As the individual chooses greater and enhances their own existence, they assume a higher energetic frequency that absorbs and reflects new possibilities. Their singular transformation enables the collective to evolve, pulling along and leading the way for others.

Here are some conscious truths that may inspire you to find your greatness in 2019!!

1.Realize you are the ultimate creator in your life

Whatever’s going on in your experience right now, is all about you. You may have had all sorts of circumstances that haven’t worked out as you wanted them to. You may be upset by certain people or situations, but you created all of it. That is, you created the ‘good’ and the ‘bad’.

I don’t mean you are to blame, or that you are responsible for other’s choices. What it does mean, is that you attract everything in to your field of observation, your experience and your life, for a reason.

That reason is your expansion. When you change your points of view, the things you tell yourself, your beliefs, thoughts, feelings and emotions, you won’t be caught up in the past, you will be free of it.

Then, you will attract much better into your experience. So, use your power to create for you and not against you. You are capable of un-creating all the crap and creating amazing things beyond your wildest expectations. Being supported by a conscious coach, affords that kind of transformation.

2. Pain is a beautiful gift

Pain is life’s way of letting you know on a particular issue, you are separated from your higher self. You are away from your natural state of love and oneness and that gap is the pain you can feel. The purpose of pain is healing and growth.

Stored pain is like a bottle neck that stops us truly thriving and being free across all areas of life. We may think we have successfully buried something and are semi functional in other aspects of our lives. However, this never works, as something significant always leaks out and has unanticipated effects on us.

When we bury pain, it’s like going around with a sign above us, saying “Walking wounded here”. People can see it in your behavior, feel it in your energy and they know something is wrong. The reason it’s obvious, is because we have barriers up, as we don’t feel safe.

With our barriers up, we can’t allow ourselves to be loved (we aren’t a match for love, we are a match for pain). Abundance can’t flow our way either and we will struggle. Holding up barriers because we feel weak inside, is exhausting. From there, we never trust others or ourselves.

“Pain is not to be feared and avoided. It is an invitation to face ourselves and step into our greatness. On the other side of processing your pain, lies immense freedom and relief. Only you can choose”. Rose Aitken

3. Get rid of your Baggage and you pain will follow

Unhealed ‘stuff’ has a habit of bubbling up and creating problems when you least want it to. And it is there, just under the surface, influencing all of your thoughts, decisions, choices and body language.

Life has a habit of bringing you similar situations, repeatedly, until you address things properly. That is why some people appear to have such ‘shitty luck’. They don’t really, they’ve just never dealt with their pain and circumstances and learned how to redirect their future.

What causes you the most pain, is pointing you directly towards the beliefs you most need to change. I support my clients to have ease with changing theirs. We go gently through this stuff to yield rapid, powerful, results. (You can see some testimonials at the bottom of this page or here.

4. Stop Being upset at past ‘lost opportunities’

There is no such thing. What’s for you will not pass you by. You were either ready or you weren’t. It’s that simple.

If it went away, if you were overlooked, you blew it, or circumstances changed out of your control, life was redirecting you.

Usually life won’t recreate the same opportunities, but you can create new ones. If you are willing to develop wisdom as from your past losses, then even greater possibilities can show up.

5. Stop making things right or wrong. You always have a choice.

Life happens for us, not to us.

Nothing is good or bad or right or wrong, other than what your beliefs make it. Part of my job is to help you see what was beneficial about the tough things. It is also to help you extract the goodness from those experiences and see how you’ve evolved as a result.

For the first time in modern human history, science is starting to understand many things. These include, the science of energy, wisdom of the human heart and gut and how our thoughts directly influence others and our environment.

There is no need to suffer and be at the effect of your past any longer. The modalities, techniques and options out there today are wonderful. If you are an empath, if you are spiritually orientated, or open minded, I would love to work with you. Connect with me here.


For years I was at the effect of Chronic Fatigue Syndrome and unable to bust out of the prison of my physical symptoms.

I tried many options for creating change and eventually found the keys to unlocking it for me.

Along my way to greater wellness and energy, I began to look at life differently and became very resourceful and much more aware.

Here are some things I discovered that might be useful for you:

1.   I discovered that all ‘symptoms’ are a source of awareness

Because the immune and nervous system are linked when I was sick with CFS, I’d often experience any anxiety quite strongly. My body would go beserk and my emotions would follow.

After a while, I began to ask questions around this. I then latched onto the fact that I felt expanded around some people and contracted around others.

My clever body was giving me awareness about things and the people I was around were no exception. This was doubly important when I was unwell because I felt (and was) vulnerable.

Being both anxious and unwell was often overwhelming and I used to hate my body for it, until I learned and understood differently. Then, eventually I stopped and started to use this information to my advantage. Being aware of this, (and choosing appropriately based on this information), meant life got heaps easier and more wellness became possible for me.

TIP: If you are experiencing anxiety (or other symptoms), what are they telling you that you are ignoring? What’s that little thread of awareness inside you, that if you acknowledged it would lead you to make different choices?

This is not about running away, but about acknowledging your body’s wisdom and following it. Given such freedom and honoring, it’s amazing how our body will respond in kind to our attentive stewardship. They will often reward us with a physical freedom and ease we are unaccustomed to.

2.   I learned how to tell who my true friends were

I had a history of emotional and spiritual trauma as a child and teen which is what the CFS was really about. Needless to say, I didn’t always choose the kindest company. I did a lot of learning from my choices though.

At the height of my illness, I was vulnerable and needy. I had little support and couldn’t really receive from people anyway. I spent a lot of time on my own, at the effect of my symptoms. I always felt a bit disadvantaged around others, as I wasn’t functioning from a place of comfort and effectiveness in my life.

I tried to always choose expansive and positive people and events. However, I did learn that those with agendas, who are attached to you being sick. or who could take advantage of the situation, may show up.

As I started to gain more consciousness, clarity and wellness, I strengthened my boundaries. Luckily, those people weren’t a match for me any longer and fell out of my life. Now, I am not only feeling well, I am surrounded and supported by incredible loving people.

TIP: If you fired everyone in your life today, who would you re-hire? Who in your life is energetically attached to you being small and draining the energy you do have?

3.   I discovered how resilient we really are and how we play small

Every cell in your body desires for you to heal and be happy. We are designed to function optimally, flow with life and recreate our entire body every seven years. In short, we are phenomenal works of art and expressions of source energy.

We can relatively easily create huge changes and overcome traumas and challenges with the right skills. Working with energy is instantaneous. Master how to do that and you unlock the key to achieving all your desires and having a vibrant, healthy body.

We are taught to play small. We aren’t shown how to let go of upsets and emotional events. We judge ourselves and others and make them wrong and all our limitations are creations we have invented.

TIP: Where are you making small choices instead of big ones? Where do you have a limitation you aren’t acknowledging? How is that limitation manifesting for you?

4.   I came to appreciate the value of life and the unimportance of time

Life is precious. Get the most out of every opportunity and be grateful for what you have. If you find yourself facing the scenario of illness, appreciate what you can still enjoy and commit to doing whatever it takes to get well.

Healing you is the most important work you will do. In the process of undoing your illness (and healing your body), you will discover your highest values and become able to live an extraordinary life. Big challenges require big preparation and illness is an opportunity in disguise.

Sometimes, getting to where we want to be in life takes time and the Universe has it’s own perfect divine timing – not revealing change until you are truly ready for it. I was often impatient as anything to get fully well yesterday, but it just meant that I had more and more stuff to uncover, learn from and let go of.

TIP: You don’t have to become sick to discover your highest values, you can ask questions around them and get clear now. If you are sick, what are you avoiding looking at that would change everything for you?

When your symptoms are overwhelming, or you start to do a head spin and go into fear, practice gratitude instead. What is your body communicating to you? What are the things it is doing well and allowing you to still attend to? Be happy for those moments and you will likely find more of them.

5.   There is a path of least resistance for doing everything

Want to drive from A to B as fast as humanly possible without getting arrested? I’m your girl. Want a 3-course meal cooked in 30 minutes including sauces? I’ve nailed it. House require cleaning? Top to bottom in record time.

As ironic as this seems, for most of my illness I had no one else to rely on and I became strangely efficient and capable as a result. I soon discovered the quickest way of accomplishing something was as fast as possible, before my body crashed. Now I’m almost better, this serves me well, as I’ve mastered getting almost any task completed, in the blink of an eye.  

I am still meditative in the way I undertake things, I just do routine tasks very efficiently. Other people are frequently amazed and will say things to me like “That’s the fastest my dishes have ever been done”. “How did you make that yummy food so fast”? Um, that’s what I do.

TIP: You can create incredible solutions to things that seem unbelievable to others, just by being willing to be different. Set your own standards and live by them and people will be amazed.

What superpowers are you waiting to unleash that you are hiding or haven’t acknowledged? PS: It’s usually something so easy to us, we dismiss it as unimportant.

We human beings are so incredibly resilient. Often times what we think is a disaster is an opportunity waiting to be uncovered and tapped into. What we have decided would be the worst possible outcome, can be the path to our ultimate empowerment and freedom.


Read Part One of this article here 

1.Good Sleep

Enough good quality sleep is critically important for success, vitality and well-being. It’s hard to do well with anxiety if overtired, when all the body’s resources are on overdrive.

Scientists are becoming increasingly aware, that sleep quality is more important than diet and exercise combined. Sound sleep contributes to good decision making, elevated moods and a healthy body chemistry.

Having a great bedtime routine, dark bedroom, a comfy bed and limiting device time, all contributes to better sleep. As does a diet rich in melatonin inducing foods: Here are some examples:

  • Fruits and vegetables (tart cherries, corn, asparagus, tomatoes, pomegranate, olives, grapes, broccoli, cucumber)
  • Grains (rice, barley, rolled oats)
  • Nuts and Seeds (walnuts, peanuts, sunflower seeds, mustard seeds, flaxseed)

2. Meditation Through Energy Pulls

I am not a traditional meditator. In fact for years I tried and couldn’t meditate.

After receiving lots of body work that has changed my physiology, I can now meditate. However, when I do, it’s usually the side effect of actively doing other exercises, such as Energy Pulls.

There are two reasons why I can now meditate when previously I couldn’t. Firstly, everything that was blocking me, has been cleared out of my field and body over time. Two, Access Bars can put people in a brain wave state equivalent to someone who has studied meditation for 20 years. It creates something called coherence or oneness. (Watch neuroscientist Jeffery Fannin talk about this here). After experiencing this, I knew I could meditate.

Energy pulls are a tool from the modality Access Consciousness. They are designed to accelerate the attainment of your goals. This works through connecting with the energy of your goals and creating momentum by then pulling from all the people, places and things, that can support you achieve them. Next you send your energy out to those people, places and things, so they can find you.

For me this is fun! There is the visualization aspect and feeling aspects. My hands and body will be tingling as energy flows through me, at different frequencies. This is depending on what I am asking for and how much momentum is attached to each thing.

To do the exercise, you need to imagine putting all your barriers down. Expand outwards, fill the space between the molecules with your presence. Imagine a golden ball of light on your tummy and put your hands out around the ball.

Now, one by one, drop your goals into the ball and pull energy from all over the multiverse into the ball. Feel it move, notice the different sensations as you do it for different things. Observe how fast or slow the energy moves and how it feels, (light and expansive or more sticky or stubborn).

I personally pull the energy from my ball, through my body and out the back of me. That’s just my way. Other people may do this differently. When you have flowed enough energy, send a trickle of your frequency outwards. It is going to all the people, places and things that can contribute to you accomplishing your goals. The purpose of that is so they can find you.

I usually find after 15 minutes of doing this, I feel amazing, energized and tuned in. I may then do some self healing using angelic reiki, meditate with my spirit guides, or do some prayer for myself and others. I might connect with my ‘team’, or with certain energies around me that I am familiar with.

I have a very active body and mind. Traditional meditation bores me and seems counter productive. However, I like the task oriented aspects of energy pulls and self healing. Then everything flows and I feel alive!

3. I belong to a group where I am loved, respected and cared for

The biggest indicator of longevity is belonging to social groups where we are included and valued.

I feel connected in my immediate and wider community through my work. Fortunately I have several groups in which I contribute my time professionally or socially, in which I feel valued, respected and supported.

4. Healthy Friendships

I am blessed with my friendships. I love growing the beautiful friendships I already enjoy and adding new ones. These add such a richness to life that is special and meaningful.

5. I get outside in Nature whenever I can

Our bodies have rhythm or vibration which is acoustical and in harmony with that of nature. Any time we can get outside and connect with the elements, we are releasing stuff. Grounding is an amazing tool for doing this, which improves our well-being and re-aligns us with our natural state.  

This is vital when we are around technology and in air conditioned and artificially lit spaces.

6. I have a purpose that I live every day

My purpose brings me joy and lights me up. It empowers, guides and uplifts me.

Running a business is the most exhilarating and consistent way of developing yourself I have found. It’s such a journey of showing up, creating constant innovation and striving for personal excellence. It also requires being transparent, accountable and is about having massive integrity in every aspect of who you are.

I am totally committed to this journey, I trust life and I am aligned (where I am supposed to be). If that changes, I know I will be re-directed.

I can still become anxious if I haven’t managed something particularly well. However, overall the energies that I dwell in and my purpose, carries me through any difficult moments with a grace that probably isn’t mine.


1.Attending twice weekly pilates classes

Pilates is simply incredible. Even with a painful compression injury and two irregular discs in my upper back, I stubbornly avoided going, for as long as I possibly could. Months after my osteopath recommended it to me.

It’s funny now. I assumed (in my infinite wisdom), that pilates was where annoyingly positive people went to sit on big bouncy balls and count, while they did boring, pointless exercises, that looked as fun as watching paint dry. 

How wrong I was with my limiting points of view!! It’s also amusing how we often resist what we need most and I am still sometimes no exception!.

Not only is Pilates NOT boring, it makes my brain happy, it oxygenates my body, improves my immune system by working on the fascia. It strengthens all the parts of my body that support the areas around my injury. 

It relaxes me and has changed the alignment of my entire body and the way that I move, so I have far more energy. It has somehow changed my body language, the way I hold myself, move and interact with the world.

Lastly, it helps my pain. It eliminates stiffness, inflammation, energy blocks and it has even released stuck emotions. None of which I was expecting.

2. I avoid sugar

I still ingest a lot of sweet stuff, as my brain requires a lot of glucose and carbohydrate. I run twice a week, paddle board at the moment and am very busy.

I frequently use alternative sweeteners like honey and limit my processed sugar intake. When I cut out a huge amount of sugar last year, my anxiety levels plummeted.

3. I take glutathione

Glutatione is the body’s master anti-oxidant. As such, it is implicated in the metabolic processes of the brain and the liver.

Glutathione contributes to good concentration, positive moods, high energy levels, slows aging and prevents disease.

Here’s more about the type of glutathione that I prefer. It’s bizarre that we aren’t even educated that glutathione exists and if we were depleted, we wouldn’t even know.

I had many of the risk factors for low glutathione, including having been an athlete as a child, many life stressors and traumas, the fact that I consume caffeine and have experienced anxiety and CFS.

What blew me away with this product, was seeing the instant difference in myself at around week 5 of taking it. Cumulative levels take that long to rise and almost overnight, you can feel entirely different. I was one of the lucky ones and it’s so good, I still take it daily 3 years later.

4. I run

Getting my heart rate up high allows me to clear my thoughts, improve my mood, release stress and feel inspired and creative.

Running keeps my blood pressure and stress levels low, joints lubricated, energy high and my endorphins pinging all over the place.

It also provides me with a level of fitness that supports physical and emotional resilience.

5. Good Nutrition and Avoiding Toxins

I watch my toxin intake level by cooking almost all meals from scratch.

I avoid alcohol, measure carefully my blood sugar levels, caffeine intake and make sure I get enough nutrition for my body to function optimally.  

I consume plenty of green leafy vegetables, fruit and lean, high quality protein, good fats and healthy carbs.  

I do a half day detox (about 3 times a year) which is very effective.

6. Effective time Management and saying ‘no’

The longer I am in business and the more I grow and develop, the more precious my time becomes. I now prioritize requests for my time and manage carefully my friendships, leisure and work activities.

With work, I allocate time to tasks directly related to quality results, that yield the best outcomes for the effort expended and I endeavor to carry out all tasks in this manner.

As a result, I have increasing amounts of energy and can get more and more accomplished. This comes from simplifying my life, improved concentration, better physiology and adopting better systems for doing things.

You can read Part Two of this article here


This is a common question I hear. Many who know me or meet me just sense if they are ready to do the work. Others, (understandably) aren’t sure, or don’t understand what I do.

Soul ‘stuff’ can seem scary to many, as we typically aren’t taught about it in Western countries. It is often made worse by some form of religious indoctrination as children. Commonly we don’t understand why we are here on a soul level, or why we have chosen the challenges we may be experiencing.

You may sense you are a soul in human form. However, you may not know how to access your own spiritual nature to succeed and become the highest version of yourself. You might deeply desire more ease with things in the physical reality, particularly if you are empathetic or sensitive.

My job as a soul coach to help with this as well as understanding who you are. It is also to provide context to choices, tendencies, abilities, talents and fears/limitations which may be there from before.

Religious dogma typically doesn’t reconcile with us knowing why we are here on earth, who we are as a soul or energetic frequency, what our purpose is for this lifetime and what our soul attributes or dominant qualities are.

Although there is some wisdom contained in the bible and similar texts, they generally don’t teach us about soul contracts, spirit guides, soul planning or anything useful, other than “Don’t be a bad person” and “You can or can’t do this or that”.

Here’s some information that may be useful to you the role of a soul coach. It explains why things work the way they do around here and how I could work with you to create change.

We are souls here in bodies, having a human experience.

Thousands of life times

We have lived many thousands of life times. In these life times we have done and been everything. Every bad, every good thing. We are all expressions of God/The Creator here in human form. We are playing out different aspects of his creation and reflecting that back to him.

Our soul is infinite, our body (for each incarnation) is finite.

After each life time (usually) when we are done with what we came here for this time around, we check out and go back to source.

This is our natural/permanent state. The human state is a temporary one.

Being here in each incarnation is what our soul does to grow and expand and experience new things. When we are parked up on a cloud ‘chilling’ we aren’t learning or growing particularly and we are here to have fun, to create and to grow among other things.

Spirit Guides

We have a team who has our back and guides who are with us always. Our guides can change and be given different roles and new guides might come on board as we grow on our soul journeys.

Pre Birth Planning

We have a pre-birth plan for each incarnation or life time we choose here. We can veer away from the plan at any stage or implement it to the letter. That is what free will is all about.

Within the plan that we chose, we can have an easy or a hard time, depending on how we view things. Often if we are choosing limitations or contraction it’s because we aren’t yet ready for growth or expansion. We may go through years of challenge before we get the awareness of what that was for, and are ready to learn from it and go forwards in a new direction.

Free Will

People can choose crappy or amazing lives.

We all have spiritual gifts and our capacities, talents and purpose.  Within each life time we explore different themes. For example, we maybe here to explore love, loss, isolation, compassion, abuse, forgiveness, redemption or other things.  

Soul Themes and Growth

Let’s say the theme for this life time was abuse. We may have had several life times where we witnessed someone we love being abused, or where we were abusive. In this lifetime, we may experience an abusive family or abusive adult relationships. We might heal that abuse in this life time and perhaps any unhealed instances from past lives simultaneously. We explore these themes from different angles.

Soul Contracts and Specific Relationships and Issues

We have soul contracts with other people for mutual growth and expansion. When we meet someone and have a good or bad feeling about them, we have known them before. When we really like someone on meeting them, we have enjoyed other life times with them. It isn’t a liking we are feeling, it is recognition.

When clients are really struggling in certain relationships, (besides looking at the psychological/physical) we look at the soul contracts playing out.

We may clear any aspects of the contract still requiring attention if a relationship is destructive or very painful. We may clear future contracts with that person if the client is willing. Or, we may just examine what they want now and the awareness they have garnered from the experience thus far.

Looking at things from a broader soul perspective credits the soul/person with knowing what they were choosing (empowering) and takes the sting out of things. They can then understand that there was a soul contract playing out which was all agreed to in advance. they then realize the other person might be abusive because they deserve it, or because they are wrong, but because the soul chose this experience to grow.

Clearing soul contracts frees both souls to go on and have other experiences and removes the entanglement that is generating the need to continue to be involved with each other now and in the future.

The client maybe still wants to be involved with that other person, but they are not pulled into something that may feel more powerful then they are. We would look at whether that person feels the learning with the other individual is now complete.

Turning Wounds Into Wisdom and Deep Transformation

In the above example I would teach the difference between soul family connections (gentle and supportive) and karmic relationships. These are intense and often destructive. We would address what needs healing from their current experience.

Then we would look at what it may have been in their family of origin that schooled them towards choosing abuse and how they can use this knowledge to avoid falling into unhealthy relationships in the future. We can assume that if they transform those aspects of their experience now, they can use free will to avoid further relationships like these in future.

We would look together at the red flags that they missed and where they were drawn into choosing that partner. Although their current relationship may have been necessary for growth, it is possible to learn from the experience and avoid future abuse, by turning their wounds into wisdom.

That experience becomes very generative and beneficial in the long term. It does take a lot of inner work, courage and willingness to examine things on such a deep level.

Courage, Inquiry and Application Leads to Rapid Change and Evolution

If clients are willing to engage on this level, they often end up changing the course of their entire future and the trajectory of all future choices. This is sacred work and it is the most powerful that you can engage in. It is profound and rewarding and you may often get a very strong sense of who you came here to be as a result.

Soul work isn’t for everyone, but it often gives a rich context to our choices and lends itself to powerful, sustained transformation. If a client is repeating certain psychological patterns over and over and wondering why, it is often working on the soul level that yields the breakthrough required.

Any transformational work benefits the person and their overall journey. Soul work adds another dimension and set of benefits, that can take things whole next level.


Are you a comfort eater? Do you sometimes binge on carbs and feel guilty or ashamed afterwards? Do you feel out of control around food? Are you a bit heavier than you would like, but not majorly overweight? Does your weight fluctuate and do you judge yourself for it?

Not only did I go through these struggles chronically when I was in my 20s, it is also relevant for quite a few clients currently. 

Here are some ideas to help with your mindset, the practical elements of breaking your habit/addiction and with your weight and nutrition.

1.Eat whatever your body requires, whenever it requires it

This is a radical shift to make and it may seem scary, but damn it is liberating. If you are like I was and letting your head/emotions run the show isn’t working for you, then perhaps this might be some of the answer.

This worked so well for me, because I had put all sorts of rules around what I could and couldn’t eat and should and shouldn’t eat and when. I had divorced myself from my body’s natural wisdom about what it desired to consume.

Also, I probably had nutritional imbalances from years of binging or starving, so when my body craved something, it was really craving it.

The satisfaction I garnered from eating exactly what my body required and when meant that I was so satiated, energized and happy, I didn’t go into my psychological need for food as much, or in the same way.

2. Determine the difference between hunger and uncomfortable emotions

I found when I was younger and comfort eating, I was making a lot of rules around dieting, what I could eat and couldn’t eat and I would ‘punish’ myself if I got it ‘wrong’.

In hindsight, much of the whole scenario was about self-rejection not about the state of my body, although I was dwelling on my weight.  I focused on my appearance in a negative way, however I was quite broken inside from things I had been through.  My pre-occupation with food and my size was a manifestation of my inner turmoil.

I was projecting my inner pain and dis-satisfaction, fears and needing to have a sense of control, onto my body.

I lacked good wisdom, guidance, support, structure in my life.  As well as good company, kind and caring people and I didn’t know how to be that way with myself.

Back then stuffing food down was a way to numb feelings, but also a way to connect with them that felt safe, following the shame and secrecy of a binge.

It was also a carefully constructed way of checking out of life, putting a barrier between me and others and a way of not showing up in the world and avoiding things. In time, I got a bit better at averting a binge.

Some questions I used to prevent comfort eating were:

 “Am I hungry or upset about something, am I bored or lonely”?

“How will I feel afterwards if I go ahead and eat this now”?

“Will this food contribute to my energy levels and sense of self-worth, or will it diminish them”?

“How can I distract myself so I’m out of the house and doing other things”?

“How can I not isolate myself right now and what would shift my physiology so I have endorphins instead of stress”?

3. Make sure your nutritional needs are met

It’s less likely your body will have massive cravings – particularly for large amounts of sugary, high fat or carbohydrates, if it is properly nourished.

Therefore, it is easier to distinguish between comfort/psychological and genuine eating.

I also remember that if I’d gone to a lot of trouble to eat a healthy meal, I would be less likely to waste that effort by having a massive binge afterwards.

Sometimes I still did though. It’s important with an article like this to take strategies that work for you and ignore the rest. Any small changes you can adopt, will radiate outwards and quite radically empower you, allowing cumulative progress and more ease.

4. Adopt a zone based diet

This was my go to, that made me feel satiated (from the serve of fat), energized (with protein) and properly nourished with phytonutrients (from fruit and vegetables). You are also able to have small amounts of complex cabs which can be good for brain function and overall energy as well.

I found that my inflammation levels dropped and energy levels increased on the zone diet. I also lost weight easily, so if this is your thing, you will need to adjust it eventually. To maintain my current weight, I needed more complex carbs eventually, but by then I was feeling much better and the adjustment wasn’t too bad.

Of course this diet won’t be for everyone, but it does tend to be generally effective, less extreme than many vegan options and more adaptable and nourishing than the Atkins diet. There is a vegetarian or soy version of the zone diet if that interests you.

5. If you are feeling upset, don’t go near food – take a pause and be kind to yourself instead

Go take a bath, go for a walk or run, hit the gym, take a yoga class, hang out with a friend, buy coffee or a juice, go to a movie, journal…Whatever it takes.

You can always binge later if the need is still there, but in the meantime, give yourself a fighting chance of not submitting to old habits.

6. Find ways to connect with and release your feelings that feel safe – particularly if you are empathetic

I used to find journaling best. I also tried counselling and therapy, but I was so sensitive when younger, that mostly pushed my buttons too, although I learned a lot from those sessions which would give context to my later progress.  

It wasn’t until I found Access Consciousness and the Law of Attraction that I found frames of reference for life that made sense to me and allowed to put my sensitivity into a perspective that finally made sense and didn’t cripple me.

If you are extremely empathetic you are probably a healer and taking on a lot energetically that you aren’t aware of.

Learning one or more modalities for working with energy, having energetic boundaries and gifting and receiving healing deliberately (instead of accidentally) can be the start of connecting with your power and feeling less disadvantaged and maybe like you can flourish eventually.

I highly, highly recommend Access Bars, because if you are carrying around physical settings of trauma and cellular memories of binging, a Bars session will clear these out.

It will give you a clearer slate from which to implement new, more effective choices.

Access Bars is also about receiving and if we are doing a tonne of binging, we are behind pretty high walls, isolating ourselves a lot and suffering in private.

7. Read, read, read

Educate yourself. Read about different diets, understand what your body requires nutritionally and from a nurturing point of view.

Learn about what you are doing to your physiology when you binge. Read about super salads, phyto nutrients, organics, food combining, detox foods, high energy foods and ways of eating which other cultures have that we can adapt.

There is a lot of wisdom and guidance contained within them. Things like ayurvedic principles, the way the Chinese view food (like medicine) and other information such as being very relaxed when eating.

This might spoil your fun in binging, it’s hard to pretend we don’t know what we know. This however is one of the best ways I know of to ruin an addiction for ourselves and to get ready to commit to changing.

Going forwards

My progress with these things was one of trial and error. I only really stopped fully when I was ready. Binging served me until then, allowing me to navigate life until I had better skills to take over with. Remember it isn’t a wrongness, it is just a set of strategies for coping and anything that facilitates that is effective on some level.

Just realize in time you can go beyond where you are at now, you can have ease around food, you can begin to trust yourself and you can find pleasure in nourishing your body without such extremes. It is just about the right timing and right tools and information for you.

If you would like to chat to me about any of these things please click here.



One of my current mentoring clients is choosing massive changes.

She is up-leveling her life, her old choices around relationship and career. Her knowledge and level of functioning is exploding. She is understanding old paradigms and her childhood archetyping – the resulting adult behaviors and anxieties and changing them. This involves setting new standards for herself, implementing powerful new boundaries and much more…

This week she shared how it’s been intense, emotional and challenging for her and in spite of this she is committed, clear and feels drawn to the outcomes she knows are waiting for her on the other side of her current discomfort, disarray and upheaval. (She is so right)

I said to her “Perhaps you’d be willing to acknowledge the MASSIVE changes you are choosing”!

She started to laugh, really hard and shook her head. In that moment she had a break-though. She got that choosing the same, being average and basing her life off the way everyone else operates in this reality, isn’t for her.

As she acknowledged her truth, something clicked inside her and her sense of fear, doubt and trepidation left.

She knows she’s in the thick of things right now, that this is the biggest learning curve of her life so far. (Much has already changed for her in the course of undertaking her mentoring program). Yet she knows she was more than ready. It was no longer her option staying the way she was.

She also knows she is fully led and supported, by life and the Universe, to get to where she wants to be.  It wasn’t going to be straightforward or easy. However, she is already developing a strong sense of divine timing, inherent purpose, self-trust and allowing. It is truly beautiful to see. As the fresh insights drop in, she is integrating these, along with new tools, skills and ways of being that feel strange and unfamiliar.

It was very special to share those moments with her and to see her wonderment, joy and clarity open up out of confusion, fear and uncertainty.

I’m not suggesting that radical change is right for everyone.  However when we are truly ready, if we do the work and stay the course, the sensation that unfolds of watching ourselves evolve is truly amazing. There is a sense of inner peace and accomplishment, relief, ease and self trust.

That recognition that ‘this is what I was hoping would come and it’s even better than I thought it would be’ along with ‘Wow, I’ve really done this’, is a mind blowing feeling.

My client is kicking ass and I am so proud of her. Following what you know, breaking away from all your old patterns, trusting yourself, despite what people might be thinking is brave. Having no idea who you’ll be at the end of that process (but choosing to change anyway), is terrifying and inspiring.

She is uplifting me, reminding me why I do this work and what we can achieve when we put in the effort to reach that next level of our potential. I am in awe of her brilliance, privileged to be a part of this and am grateful for who she is.


My client has now graduated. In the final weeks of her program she surpassed her own expectations again. She is incubating further realizations and insights, has consolidated on the earlier work we did together and is connecting with a new sense of how far she has come.

What she is choosing for herself now, wouldn’t have been possible 6 months ago. The sense of reward, accomplishment and gratitude for the choices she has made, is palpable to everyone around her. She is managing her life differently, her anxiety has dissipated, her relationships are different.

She is glowing, empowered, joyful and her life is expanding. Her lows are much higher, she has put previous challenges behind her and is vibrating in another way. She is now attracting better circumstances, opportunities and people into her life. There is a synchronicity present, that she wasn’t able to receive before.

She is enjoying her life, feels happy and fulfilled and excited for the future. She is motivated, more mindful and tuned in to who she is and what lies ahead.

Some helpful Questions When Considering Intense Personal Development: (My programs are intense and NOT for the faint-hearted) 

💪 If you had an infinite supply of courage and you couldn’t get it wrong, what would you choose?

💪 How much change are you ready for? What is holding you back from your jumping off place?

💪 What could you create if you were supported by an expert to change your life? How would that make you feel that your life were worth so much attention and investment of time and resources to make it exactly the way you want it?

💪 Are you tired of playing small when you know something is far greater for you? How much energy does it take to hold that in place and keep pushing away those possibilities?

💪 Are you sick of dragging your life time of baggage around with you? Are you fed up of your limitations, your insecurities, your fears and your old ways of doing things. Are you sick of not achieving what you would like to because you don’t have the know how to change what isn’t working?

💪 Let’s imagine 12 months from now, you didn’t choose mentoring when you knew you wanted to…

You made it about the timing, how busy you are, what your partner would think, or about the money. Although really, you were scared at what those changes would create, not knowing who you’d become in the process or how your life would be afterwards.

Picture this – one year on, nothing has changed, except you’ve paid another year of bills, you’re a year older and you’ve made some progress and overcome some things. The deep stuff you want to be different, isn’t. How do you feel?

Being different and changing takes chops, effort, courage, commitment, perseverance and it isn’t for the faint hearted. You’ve got to be ready, feel the call and be willing to honour that. Is 2019 YOUR year?

Apply to work with me here:


My teenage years were excruciatingly painful. Fortunately, I’ve had the chance to heal my younger me and here is some of what I would have wanted her to know 💗 

You are perfect, divinely beautiful and whole

You are loved, worthy and capable of achieving all your dreams. The biggest block to you doing so, is not other people, it’s what you tell yourself.

How you look by society’s standards is irrelevant. How you talk to yourself inside is what truly matters as well as using your talents every day for your pleasure and your development.

NEVER make anyone else’s opinion more important than yours

Others will say awful things to you. It’s not a reflection of who you are, it’s a reflection of them. The reason people say those things to you in particular is because you are sensitive and highly aware and that is not a wrongness, it is a strong ness and what makes you so special, kind and caring.

In time, you will grow to see the untruth in those words, you will see the fear and self-loathing behind them and you will have compassion for those people.

Words have POWER

The Universe works via energy. All words have an energy attached to them. Be careful when you make certain energies real and true for you by speaking words that are negative. Always state things in the BEST possible terms and tell the GREATEST story energetically that you can. Whatever energies you choose, the Universe will bring you more of.

You can be, do and have ANYTHING

All that burning ambition inside you will take you far, but you need to be your own best friend always, be kind to your body and keep your thoughts light and happy. (In general of course, not when you are upset or processing something). If you can do this, you will arrive at your goals much sooner, with much more ease.

You are not alone and you are loved

We are operating from behind a veil of forgetfulness, which makes us think we are disconnected, vulnerable, alone and helpless, the last thing you are is helpless and you are surrounded by love and support from the unseen. Trust this ALWAYS.

Life has a perfect plan for you

Rather like a video game, you have certain challenges to overcome to get to the next level (although it is never linear and it is never done).

Your soul chose those challenges and they are perfect for you for this life time. This life time is part of a much bigger journey you are on and you are lucky to be here, in this body and on this planet.

You are here for a reason and the more you grow, expand and use your courage, the more will be revealed to you. You got this!!!!

Ask for help/support/knowledge

Every time something causes you pain or there seems to be a never-ending issue that confounds you, feel into it. Allow it to overwhelm you, be present with it. Thank it for what it is showing you.

Then ask the Universe for help/support/knowledge/or the right people to help you change it. Nothing is bigger than you, but some things will test you so that you can grow.

Trust your knowing

Whenever you feel uncomfortable in a situation or event or certain people, that is your awareness letting you know that thing is not for you. Honour that knowing whilst meeting your obligations. Never decide you are wrong for feeling that way.

Honour you Parents whether or not they can honour you

Forgive your parents for all the ways they trigger you and for all the things you didn’t receive from them, that you needed. You have a contract with them to teach you certain things and they are delivering their end of the deal, to perfection.

Put those things aside and get on with your life the best way you know how. Believe you can and will heal when the time is right. At that point, you will disentangle from the past, understand those experiences and use them for your greatest good.

Learn to let things go

Anything that is painful contains a gift and information, which is able to be unraveled and revealed, when you are ready. However, let go of the ENERGY of that thing as soon afterwards as you can. The insight can come after.

Return all unwanted energy to wherever it originated from, asking for life to transmute into something else. Learn a system of letting go that allows you to move through life unencumbered and unburdened by people’s nonsense.

Stay true to yourself, who you are and what you know

There is an inherent wisdom, knowing and common sense that is yours alone and it is immensely valuable if honoured and well applied.  Be open to learn new things, but don’t compromise you in the process. Don’t give up your values to be accepted.

Learn the art of discernment

Not everyone is kind or caring or has your best interests at heart. Don’t go around treating everyone as your friend. Some people aren’t.

People won’t necessarily share your perspectives or ability to reason and aren’t always capable of recognizing Universal truth. That is okay, just get on with being you, it’s none of your business.

Judgment sucks and creates Pain

Don’t judge others and ESPECIALLY don’t judge you. We can only judge things we are or have done ourselves. Judgment doesn’t help you become better or help anyone else either. It just keeps perpetuating more crap that everyone is trying to avoid.

Don’t try to reason with people who inflict pain on you. Instead wonder why you feel pain and put your energy into clarifying that. Don’t make other people’s opinions more important than your own. That is the worst injustice you can do to yourself.

Perfectionism is a Recipe for procrastination and misery

Give up perfectionism, it is one of the biggest wastes of your energy there is. Care, do your best, take care of the details to a great standard and then LET IT GO. Otherwise you are wasting time.

Treat your body well. Learn to connect with what it is telling you

Your body is like a radio antenna which is constantly aware of things. It will try to tell you stuff via pain or symptoms as it doesn’t have a voice. If you can figure out the language of your body and honour it, you way forward will be so much easier.

Use humour and don’t take yourself too seriously

Life is a grand old adventure. We are here to create, to expand, to commune with other souls and to grow. Don’t take it too seriously. Spirit doesn’t, why should you? I once had a friend say to me “Wear life like a lose garment”. That made a lot of sense.

Be proud of who you are

You have much to offer the world. You are such a gift to the planet, to yourself and to others or you wouldn’t be here. Keep going forwards no matter what. Learn to trust that things always work out well for you and they will.  There is a bigger plan at play here and in time you will understand.

You are the divine embodied

You are capable, beautiful beyond your knowing and you have a loving heart. Always trust this. It will take you years to find out who you truly are and to connect with your soul purpose. It is magnificent and worth the pain. Try not to be hard on yourself in this process. All is well, you are loved and you never walk alone.


This blog is written by me but is based on principles taught in Access Consciousness. A modality which I teach and use in private sessions.

I love the Access views on healthy relating as they are so contributive and generative and yet practical. They allow for growth and creativity and yet don’t have a basis in co-dependence or unhealthy relating the way many spiritual models do.

Did you know that ‘relationship’ refers to the distance between two objects? How interesting that term is defined by proximity rather than by quality.

Here are the five Aspects of Healthy Relating.


Always honor the other person (whilst also honouring you of course). To honor means to hold in high regard, which I interpret as follows:

You speak to your partner as the highest version of themselves. What this means is that we don’t hold in place past grievances or resentments, we just speak straight to their soul and act as if they are always going to come from the place of highest integrity, as we must do with them.

You have no agenda for them, other than their highest good and well-being whatever that looks like. You place what’s good for them ahead of what you may want from them every time.

It’s no one else’s job to provide us with anything other than to choose to be in relationship with us from day to day if they wish and to choose to create with us and to be truly present with us in doing so. If their highest good were to leave us, we should be happy for them on their journey ahead of sad for ourselves. That is honouring rather than obligation.

2. Allowance

Know that the other person will always be operating from what’s right for them and be in allowance of their choices, even if you don’t approve or agree.

Sometimes people need to make poor choices to grow and although we can give our opinion if asked, it doesn’t mean that they will choose for them based on what we think they should do.  

Being in allowance means you don’t judge the other person and make them wrong and you don’t allow yourself to get caught up in reacting to them.

In other words, their choices have nothing to do with you. We are great at personalizing things, in reality though little of what others choose is about us at all.

By practicing non-judgment your good feelings towards them can flow and you can receive the other person and they you in order to enjoy one another, to have fun and create together.  

3. Appreciation

“Appreciation is adoring someone in all their awesomeness without expectation” – Rose Aitken

For most people being appreciative may be as close to experiencing unconditional love as they will get.

For almost everyone their definition of love involves conditions such as “I love you as long as you don’t embarrass me”, “I love you as long as you fulfil the conditions of being my arm candy”, “I love you as long as you keep me company and make me feel good about myself”.

Gratitude is a lower vibration than appreciation and implies relief. “I’m so glad you helped me with this”, “Thank you getting my car going today”, “I’m grateful you did this for me”.

Appreciation acknowledges what is amazing about the other person without attachment and therefore is a practical way of loving.

4. Vulnerability

When we have barriers up which most of us do much of the time, we aren’t being truly vulnerable. Other people sense when we are comfortable in our own skin, are really present with them and being totally ourselves.

This is an awesome gift as we give them permission to do the same and we show them we trust them (and trust ourselves) in the process.

To be vulnerable takes courage, lack of attachment to outcome and some wisdom about the situation. It is a risk, but applied well results in enormous gain and the ability to be fully engaged with ourselves, with others and all of life.

5. Kindness

To me this is a given and is obvious. Just be kind. We have a choice how we behave and interact with others and anything goes as long as it’s kind.

It pays to be aware of what others can handle or deal with and if you can understand that, you will do well in terms of delivering what is kind for them.

Being kind to ourselves is so important also as our relationship with ourselves is the most important one we will ever have. It encourages other people to be kind to us and value us also.


1.Eliminate Unhelpful Thoughts, Feelings and Emotions

“Your outer world is a reflection of your inner world. To change your circumstances you must change your internal attitudes, beliefs and emotions” Reuben Cheve

Don’t be critical of and negative towards yourself, or think ill of other people and situations. It’s pretty tough to win at life, if your outlook is miserable and impossible to build success over the top of that. It may not be your fault you think that way, as we are heavily entrained and conditioned to certain perspectives. However, changing how you think is your responsibility.

There are many methods and ways of disabling negative thought patterns. To do this thoroughly, it is a matter of destroying the negative underlying beliefs that may be deeply ingrained. For this to work, you have to be willing to take a leap of faith and make the effort. It requires honesty and an ability to self reflect.

This will always be a worthwhile decision. Without your limiting thoughts and beliefs you will have greater ease, less resistance and be able to excel and win at life more often. This creates momentum and progress on a new trajectory, which wasn’t previously possible.

2. Everything Can Be Changed

When we believe change is possible, it is. I see miracles happen often within my life, the work that I do, in my client sessions, the classes that I teach or attend, in my colleagues lives and their work also.

To achieve your own miracle, you have to want the chang, more than anything else and be willing to undertake whatever is required to get there.

The two reasons people desire change is in pursuit of pleasure, or to avoid pain.

Pain is useful, as it is our inner self telling us we have work to do.

Life is designed to be lived in joy. Any time we are unhappy we are away from our natural state.

We don’t have to tolerate feeling unhappy. If we are that is nature’s way of telling us to change our thinking or change the situation.

3. Don’t waste time on Regrets

Nothing is ever wasted and there are no right and wrong choices, only different choices. Too many times we are taught to expend energy on regretting something that never was for us. This is the true waste of our time and talents.

We are taught to tough out a bad situation long after its expiry date to ‘not quit’ and to ‘get the lesson’. Whilst always being open to receive awareness and learn about ourselves and others is good, don’t apply these principles to your detriment.

If it feels bad it is, choose again. If it lights you up from the inside, that’s also a sign. It’s not frivolous, too easy or wrong. Always trust what you know.

4. Life Happens For you and not to you

You are an epic creator and everything that shows up in relation to you, is something that you have attracted for your progress, growth or development.

We can’t change what we can’t own and often when we seek to improve our lot, we may not realize the extent to which we are powerful and in control of ourselves and our lives.

We may feel that circumstances brought us to this point, that life is hard or unfair and that we have been harmed by other people. Perhaps you are sick, broke, your family are assholes, or your spouse has just left and you think that is the source of your troubles.

The thing is never the source of our troubles, it is always us. This can be a very challenging shift in logic to make and may make you uncomfortable or angry to read. Reality is, nothing can be painful unless we attribute a meaning to it that is upsetting. Even if someone close to you dies or betrays you, that is still not the source of your pain. You may have a lot of emotion to release around that thing, but how you give meaning to those events is up to you. There are a lot of spiritual perspectives for example on death, that allow us to understand that person’s passing in a different way from the scary and lonely one that we may have been taught.

Huge challenges and difficulties are always chosen by our soul in advance of our coming here, so we can do the work of change. We aren’t taught this, so things can seem very unfair and perhaps we expect life to be easy or pleasant all the time. We don’t grow through ease. When life gets tough, we can resist and prolong our misery, or we can throw ourselves into the fire and learn new ways. These will afford us insight, learning, integration and healing that leaves us wise and altered.

5. Empathy/Sensitivity is a huge advantage used right

Most empaths react emotionally to things and are also aware of other people’s thoughts, feelings and emotions. They are often crippled by the intensity of this capacity and don’t know what to do with it.

Think about it a little deeper. Being aware of what others are feeling and thinking is a super power, but not if you are going to react to that information and be upset by it.

I teach my empathetic clients to separate the energy of what they are perceiving from the awareness or information. It then becomes a super power, instead of a hinderance.

6. Change doesn’t have to be slow or difficult

In my experience, the first way to create change is to remove anything blocking you from receiving personal change and being/doing/having that trait, quality or thing.

You will then have to take consistent action to create new results. When we clear blocks, we get to fill that space with what we would prefer to have. Including different thoughts, feelings and emotions, new ways of being or habits, friends, lifestyles or outcomes.

Sometimes after clearing a block, it takes a bit of adjustment to get our head around how rapidly changes show up. Particularly if we have been experiencing stuckness for a while. We may know the change we desire to make, but have fear or discomfort embodying the shift required. A good coach or facilitator can ease us into it.

Gone are the days where change is slow and exceedingly hard. Humanity is rapidly accelerating and the collective consciousness is raising. There are more and more techniques for improvement being brought to earth. There are many gifted light workers, coaches and facilitators around to choose from.